Jets News

Valentine’s Day Gifts for the New York Jets

By Alan Schechter
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Happy Valentine’s Day, Jet Pressers. Hopefully tonight you will take the time to appreciate that special someone in your life. If currently there isn’t one, well, what better night to meet someone than Valentine’s Day. You never know?

This morning, I thought I would have a little fun with you guys and girls. We know how it is, trying to pick out the correct Valentine’s gift for our ladies, do we not? Well, what if we had to romance members of the Jets? Maybe they are thinking about leaving us, or are still undecided about us. Maybe we have been together a long time, and need to show our appreciation for the relationship.

This morning, we will look at a few current Jets, and what the most appropriate Valentine’s Day gift might be for them, to keep them happy (guys, we know all about this)

Remember, I am not insinuating these players would “want” these types of gifts, just having fun, thinking about what a good gift would be at the current stage of the relationship.

LARON LANDRY-TWO DOZEN LONG STEMMED ROSES: This is the perfect example of the new, torrid relationship that is so exciting, you just want to wine and dine. We got together about a year ago, and they have made such a difference in our lives, as Landry did on the field. Landry represents the type that likes to go out and party, and gets noticed people even if they are with someone.

But they were such a change for the better in your life, you badly want to keep them around. Same for Landry, the way he played in the middle of the field was such a change of culture, we need him. So what says “romance” and “stay with me”? Two dozen long stemmed roses.

Sept 30, 2012; East Rutherford, NJ, USA; New York Jets wide receiver Santonio Holmes (10) catches a pass while being defended by San Francisco 49ers strong safety Donte Whitner (31) during the first half at MetLIfe Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Ed Mulholland-USA TODAY Sports

SANTONIO HOLMES-SPA KIT: Guys, don’t the ladies feel the love when you get them the bubble baths, the massage stuff, the lotions…etc? I know that my wife does. It shows you care when you want her to take time for her, so she can relax.

We have been together with Santonio Holmes for a few years now, and we need to remind him that we still care. He’s coming off major surgery, so what better way to show it than with a relaxing spa kit? He could soothe his weary feet, and just relax after practice/games, so there you have it.

Dec. 30, 2012; Orchard Park, NY, USA; New York Jets cornerback Antonio Cromartie (31) against the Buffalo Bills at Ralph Wilson Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Timothy T. Ludwig-USA TODAY Sports

ANTONIO CROMARTIE-BOX OF HEART SHAPED CHOCOLATES: Unless the one you care about has an allergy of course, who doesn’t love the chocolates? I know that my wife can’t get enough of the sweet treats on Valentine’s Day. It makes a great gift to show how much you love someone.

Well, it’s time to show the love for Antonio this year. When our “sweetheart”, to complete the analogy, Darrelle Revis, got hurt, or went away for a while, we all thought we would be lost. But we weren’t, as Antonio Cromartie filled Darrelle’s shoes quite well. We all saw how well he performed. He kept the “relationship” more than healthy, so we get him some chocolates.

TIM TEBOW-CARD: You might wonder why I, of all people, are sending Tim Tebow anything? Fair question, as anyone who reads this web page knows how I feel about him, but hear me out.

Clearly, this is a relationship that is not going to work out, and will end with a breakup soon. But, we are still together for now. The relationship is not ending because Tim did anything wrong. From the Jets perspective, this is one of those, “It’s not you it’s me”, type of relationships. We have to do the right thing and acknowledge the day since we are still together, so a card it is.

MUHAMMAD WILKERSON-THE WORKS(FLOWERS, CANDY..ETC): This is the “one” we need to pull out all the stops for. The way Mo came on in his second season, he made us all fall for him. He became a dominant player along the Jets defensive front, making us forget about players gone by.

To continue the analogy, this is the one that did so much for us, we never want them to leave. We “over romance” this person, to make them never consider going away. So, we go full out, flowers, candy, and whatever else we can think of.

There you have it, my Valentine’s Day gifts for some of the Jets. Thanks for reading.

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